


Runaway Jedi

by idrilhadhafang



Series: Jedi Poe AU 2 [1]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Gen, Jedi Poe, Jedi Poe Dameron, Letters, M/M, POV Poe, POV Poe Dameron, Slow Burn Poe Dameron/Ben Solo
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-15
Updated: 2017-11-16
Packaged: 2018-12-30 05:08:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12101400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idrilhadhafang/pseuds/idrilhadhafang
Summary: When Poe Dameron left the Jedi Order, he expected to fight in the war against Snoke. He didn't expect to fall in love when Ben entered the war, or to run into something from his past.





	1. Poe's Letter

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing.

_Dear Ben,_

_How are things going in the Enclave? I wish I didn't have to leave you behind, you know. I wish that you could come with me. I guess you are too young, but still..._

_I'm on the ship. We're heading out to Force-knows-where, honestly. Anything just to fight against Snoke. Honestly, I guess I shouldn't have shouted at Master Skywalker the way I did. I was just frustrated._

_I just hope you're doing all right. I miss you already, you know. It's not really the same without the team together. Dameron and Solo, kicking around some cargo holds and taking names. I just hope things will turn out all right in the end._

_Poe_

Poe Dameron sighed and sent the letter. It was one of those moments when he wondered how he was supposed to phrase all this. He and Ben had been used to being a team together, going on missions for the Jedi Order and taking names. And yet he couldn't find a good way to say how exactly much Ben meant to him and how much he hated the idea of leaving. 

He'd been seventeen when those feelings had come up. Now...now it seemed he was off to Force-knows-where without being able to properly express how much Ben meant to him. 

Why did words fail him in times like this? 

"You okay?" one of the soldiers next to him said. She was a pretty young woman, with black hair tied back in a ponytail. 

Poe nodded. "I've never actually left the Enclave before," he said. 

"You're a Jedi?"

"Yeah." Though Poe couldn't say that he was part of the Order anymore. One screaming match with Master Skywalker and he good as forfeit that right. 

"So what's it like?" the soldier said, and judging by her smile, Poe could tell that she was already excited just at the prospect of having met a Jedi, let alone someone training under Luke Skywalker. 

Poe envied her.

"Well," he said, "It's pretty...interesting..."

Even talking with the soldier on the way there, who he learned was named Jessika Pava, it didn't do much to change his mind about going back. He only wished that Ben were there with him. Still, he had made his choice long ago. 

The best he could do was still keep in touch. 


	2. Chapter 2

The letter that Ben got from Poe shouldn’t have hurt as much as it did, but it did, and Ben stored the datapad away after reading it. How was he going to explain everything to Poe, really? How was he going to explain that Poe’s absence created a sort of vulnerability in him that he couldn’t explain? 

The team had never been split up like that before. As far as Ben could remember, they had been together. All but inseparable. But now...

Now Poe was on his own. Ben...Ben was alone. Too young to join the fight, as much as he wanted to. Instead, he was all but imprisoned in the Enclave, going over what went wrong. 

The fight with his uncle. Poe telling him to take care of himself. Things like that. 

“Ben?” Annie’s voice. “Are you okay?”

Ben shook his head. “Not really.”

”Is it about Poe?”

Ben nodded. 

“I hope he’s all right,” Annie said. “I really do.”

”I do too.”

It was at dinner that Ben ran into a problem. That problem being Master Naris. Of course, Naris always seemed to have problems with Ben and Poe both. He truly did. 

“I should have known,” Naris said. “He was never a true Jedi. He no doubt fancied himself to be, but he wasn’t strong enough.”

”That’s not true.” Ben didn’t know where this sudden burst of courage came from, but it was something that surprised him. 

Naris stares at him in astonishment, which faded into scorn. “So, young Solo speaks up.”

”He’s a better Jedi than you’ll ever be,” Ben said. “At least he’s not a pathetic bully like you.” 

And he left, the others whispering all the while. 

It was back in his room that it hit Ben. All those pleasantly nervous feelings, that desire to defend Poe...where did it all come from? Could he — but he and Poe were simply friends, weren’t they? 

Ben climbed into bed, trying vainly to fall asleep even as his troubled thoughts danced around his head. 


	3. Defending Honor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben gets in a fistfight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing.

The next day didn’t exactly go better. No, that was an understatement. Jimmy Nichos was starting in on Ben and his friends, as usual, but then he started in on Poe. 

“No wonder you two are so close,” Jimmy said. “You’re both losers.”

Ben froze. Already, he could feel the anger roaring in his ears. “Say that again,” he said, coldly. 

“He’s a loser. Loser son of two loser Rebels, and now he’s a bigger loser for going off to fight — ’’

Ben lashed out at him with his fist, and the fight began, Ben scrabbling at Nichos and punching everywhere he could reach. Nichos was practically a bloody mess by the time that Uncle Luke intervened. 

“That’s enough, both of you,” Luke said. “Ben, come with me. Master Mei, take Jimmy to the healing ward.”

Master Mei did so. Luke turned to Ben. “Ben, you’re fifteen years old. You’re better than this.”

”He insulted Poe,” Ben said. 

“You’re not going to defend Poe’s honor by getting in fights.”

”I can try,” Ben said. 

“Why does it matter to you so much?” Luke said. 

“He’s my friend. Poe, I mean.” But there was something else. Something behind these strange fluttery feelings and these hugs and everything else. 

_I love him._

The realization hit Ben with the force of a runaway speeder. But Poe would never return his feelings, would he? After all, he no doubt only saw Ben as a kid. Fifteen years old. No doubt not knowing what exactly love was, let alone feeling it for the first time. 

But he loved Poe. 

Stars willing he did. 

“Ben?” Luke’s voice. 

Ben forced a smile. “I’m fine,” he said. “Really.”

But inside, he knew he wasn’t. Not only was the team essentially broken up, but he was in love with Poe and he couldn’t say anything. 


End file.
